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The "Application for Permission to Date My Daughter" is a document that takes an amusing and exaggerated approach to the protective nature some parents feel when their teenage daughters begin dating. While the form masquerades as a standard application, it humorously requires applicants to supply a comprehensive array of personal information, including a complete financial statement, job history, ancestral lineage, and current medical report. Questions range from basic details such as name, date of birth, height, weight, and intelligence quotient, to more unusual queries regarding the applicant's Boy Scout rank, ownership of a van, truck, or waterbed, and even the number of years the applicant's parents have been married. The form also probes the applicant's views on punctuality, abstinence, and respect with creatively phrased questions. It goes further to jest about the repercussions of furnishing false information, with penalties ranging from death to "Hilary Clinton kiss torture." The closing note sarcastically thanks applicants and ominously mentions a lengthy processing time. Applicants are warned against attempting to contact the form's issuer, with a cryptic caution about potential visits from intimidating figures if their application is rejected. This document, while not a serious template for parental vetting, highlights the protective instincts and humor some parents employ when navigating the complexities of their children's adolescence.

Preview - Application Date Daughter Form

APPLICATION FOR PERMISSION TO DATE MY DAUGHTER

Note: This application will be incomplete and rejected unless accompanied by a complete financial statement, job history, ancestral lineage, and current medical report from your doctor.

1.NAME: __________________________________________________ Date of Birth: ______________________________

2.Height: __________ WEIGHT: __________ IQ: _________ G.P.A. ___________

3.YEAR IN SCHOOL: _____ or, IF GRADUATED YR. COMPLETED:_____ SCHOOL NAME: ________________________

4.SOCIAL SECURITY #: _____-_____-_____ DRIVER’S LICENSE #:______________________________ STATE:_______

5.BOY SCOUT RANK: _________________________________________________________________________________

TROOP LEADER’S NAME & TELEPHONE NUMBER:______________________________________________________

6.HOME ADDRESS: ________________________________ CITY: __________________STATE: ____ ZIP CODE: ______

7.NAME OF POLICE CHIEF IN HOME TOWN: ______________________ PHONE NUMBER: _______________________

8.Do you have one MALE and one FEMALE parent? _________ yes/no

If no, explain: _______________________________________________________________________________________

__________________________________________________________________________________________________

9.Number of years parents married: ______________

10.Do you own a van? ____ A truck with oversized tires? ____ A waterbed? ___Tattoo?____Do you have an earring? ____

Nose ring? ____ Belly button ring? ____ Other piercing? ____

(IF YOU ANSWERED YES TO ANY OF #10, DISCONTINUE APPLICATION AND LEAVE PREMISES FOREVER!)

11.In 20 words or less what does LATE mean to you? _________________________________________________________

_______________________________________________________________________________________________________

_______________________________________________________________________________________________________

12.In 20 words or less what does ABSTINENCE mean to you? __________________________________________________

_______________________________________________________________________________________________________

_______________________________________________________________________________________________________

13.In 20 words or less, what does DON’T TOUCH MY DAUGHTER mean to you?____________________________________

_______________________________________________________________________________________________________

14.What Church do you attend? ____________________________ How often?_____________________________________

Pastor’s name? _______________________________ Phone number? ________________________________________

15.When would be the best time to interview your father, mother, and pastor?_______________________________________

16.Answer by filling in the blank, please answer freely - all answers are confidential: (That means I won’t tell anyone - ever - I promise).

A.If I were shot, the last place on my body I would want to be wounded is in the_______________________________________________.

B.If I were beaten, the last bone I would want broken is the_______________________________________________________________.

C.A woman’s place is in the _______________________________________________________________________________________.

D.The one thing I hope this application does not ask me about is: __________________________________________________________.

E.When I first meet a girl, the thing I notice about her first is: ____________________________________________________________.

(Note: If answer E begins with “T” or “A”, discontinue the application and leave the premises FOREVER. Also note, keeping your head low and running in a serpentine

fashion is highly recommended!)

17.What do you want to be IF you grow up? _________________________________________________________________

I SWEAR THAT ALL INFORMATION SUPPLIED ABOVE IS TRUE AND CORRECT TO THE BEST OF MY KNOWLEDGE UNDER PENALTY OF DEATH, DISMEMBERMENT, NATIVE AMERICAN ANT TORTURE, CRUCIFIXION, ELECTROCUTION, CHINESE WATER TORTURE, RED HOT POKERS, AND HILARY CLINTON KISS TORTURE.

Signed: ________________________________________________________

(That means your name, MORON)

Thank you for your interest. Please allow 4 to 6 years for processing. You will be contacted in writing if your application is approved. Please do not try to call or write (since you probably can’t, and it would cause you injury.) If your application is rejected you will be notified by two gentlemen wearing white ties, white shoes, black suits and carrying violin cases (you might want to watch your back and keep your doors and windows locked).

Form Data

Fact Detail
Form Title Application for Permission to Date My Daughter
Requirement for Submission Must be accompanied by a financial statement, job history, ancestral lineage, and a current medical report.
Content Included Name, Date of Birth, Height, Weight, IQ, GPA, School Information, Social Security and Driver’s License Number, Scouting Details, Home Address, Local Police Chief Information, Family Details, Vehicle Ownership, Views on Timeliness and Abstinence, Religious Affiliation, Parent and Pastor Interview Availability, Personal Opinions and Views.
Screening Questions Questions on vehicle ownership, piercing, tattoos, and first impressions are designed to screen applicants immediately.
Humorous Elements Includes exaggerated consequences for falsifying information and suggests an overly protective and humorous approach to the dating approval process.
Processing Time 4 to 6 years for processing, indicating a humorous exaggeration of bureaucratic inefficiency.
Notification Method Approval is communicated in writing, while rejection may be indicated by two gentlemen in specific attire, adding a humorous and cinematic twist to the denial process.

Instructions on Utilizing Application Date Daughter

Before starting the Application for Permission to Date My Daughter, applicants are required to gather necessary documentation such as a financial statement, job history, ancestral lineage, and a current medical report from their doctor. These materials must accompany the completed form. Here’s a step-by-step guide on how to fill out the form:

  1. Enter your full name and Date of Birth in the respective fields.
  2. Provide your Height, Weight, IQ, and G.P.A.
  3. Indicate your Year in School or the Year Graduated if applicable, along with the Name of School.
  4. Fill in your Social Security Number and Driver’s License Number, including the State where it was issued.
  5. Specify your Boy Scout Rank, including your Troop Leader’s Name and Telephone Number.
  6. Enter your Home Address, including City, State, and Zip Code.
  7. List the Name of the Police Chief in your hometown and their Phone Number.
  8. Respond to the question regarding if you have one male and one female parent, providing an explanation if needed.
  9. State the Number of Years Your Parents Have Been Married.
  10. For question 10, mark Yes or No for each item listed. If any are marked yes, discontinue the application.
  11. Describe in 20 words or less what LATE, ABSTINENCE, and DON’T TOUCH MY DAUGHTER mean to you in the respective sections.
  12. Indicate which Church you attend, How Often, the Pastor’s Name, and Phone Number.
  13. Suggest the best time to interview your father, mother, and pastor.
  14. Complete the fill-in-the-blank section with your personal responses.
  15. Write what you aspire to be IF you grow up.
  16. Read the oath at the end carefully and sign your name, indicating that all information provided is accurate to the best of your knowledge.

After completing the form, ensure all required documents are attached before submission. It is important to note that processing could take up to 4-6 years, and approval or rejection will be communicated as outlined in the instructions. Compliance with the process is crucial for the consideration of your application.

Obtain Answers on Application Date Daughter

  1. What documents are needed to complete the Application to Date My Daughter?

    To complete your application, you must provide a full financial statement, detailed job history, your familial lineage, and a current medical report from your doctor. Incomplete applications or those missing these documents will be rejected outright.

  2. Is information regarding physical appearance necessary for the application?

    Yes, the application requires specific details about your physical appearance, including height, weight, and even your GPA, indicating that a well-rounded portrayal of applicants is appreciated.

  3. What personal identifiers are required in the application?

    Applicants must provide their social security number and driver’s license number, including the issuing state. This detailed information helps ensure the authenticity and seriousness of the applicants.

  4. Why does the application ask about my Boy Scout rank and troop leader’s contact information?

    This question aims to gauge your level of commitment and community involvement. Leadership skills and personal references, like a troop leader’s testimony, can give insight into your character.

  5. What type of questions about my background and beliefs will I need to answer?

    The application probes into your family life, including the status of your parents and your stance on issues like punctuality, abstinence, and respect towards the applicant's daughter. Your answers to these questions are crucial in assessing your values and compatibility.

  6. Are there any automatic disqualifiers mentioned in the application?

    Yes, owning a van, a truck with oversized tires, possession of various body piercings, and certain types of bedroom furniture are cited as reasons to discontinue the application immediately.

  7. How does the application address my views on women and relationships?

    The application includes direct and open-ended questions designed to understand your attitudes towards women and relationships, emphasizing respect and appropriate behavior.

  8. What are the consequences of providing false information on the application?

    Applicants are warned of severe, albeit humorously exaggerated, consequences for supplying false information. This underscores the importance of honesty and integrity throughout the process.

  9. What happens after I submit the application?

    You should not expect immediate feedback. The tongue-in-cheek closing notes suggest a lengthy processing time of 4 to 6 years, along with a caution against attempting to follow up. It’s a humorous reminder that patience is key and that not all applications may be successful.

Common mistakes

When filling out the unique and humorous Application for Permission to Date My Daughter, individuals often stumble over some common pitfalls. This application, ostensibly requiring an array of detailed personal information, from financial statements to ancestral lineage, is designed more for entertainment than actual scrutiny. However, the mistakes made can serve as a cautionary reminder of the care needed when presenting any information in a formal request, even those made in jest. Here are five frequent errors to avoid:

  1. Not reading instructions carefully: The form jokingly asks for a plethora of detailed data. Applicants might overlook the tongue-in-cheek nature and fail to recognize the humor, leading them to either take it too seriously or miss essential (though amusing) requirements.

  2. Ignoring the humor: Some individuals might not understand the form's comedic value, responding with confusion or unnecessary honesty. The form, filled with over-the-top demands and ridiculous penalties for dishonesty, demands a playful engagement.

  3. Omitting requested details: Despite the form’s outlandish requests, such as submitting a complete financial statement or acquiring a current medical report, some may neglect to provide the full, albeit facetious, information requested, which undermines the form's playful intent.

  4. Misunderstanding the severity of the questions: Answers to jesting inquiries, such as detailing one's Boy Scout rank or naming the hometown police chief, if taken too earnestly, might not only misinterpret the form’s satirical tone but could also lead to unnecessarily detailed responses.

  5. Failure to recognize the underlying message: Behind its exaggerated conditions and impossible-to-meet stipulations, the form humorously underscores a protective parent’s concerns regarding who may date their child. This light-hearted vetting process is often misinterpreted by individuals not acknowledging the affectionate, albeit hyperbolic, sentiment driving the questionnaire.

In conclusion, the Application for Permission to Date My Daughter serves as a humorous test of one's ability to navigate a gauntlet of absurd and impossible requests. A successful navigation pays homage not only to a potential suitor's respect and humor but also to their capacity to appreciate the underlying affection and concern a parent harbors for their child’s well-being and happiness.

Documents used along the form

When considering the completion and submission of the humorous and satirical Application to Date My Daughter form, it's wise and often necessary to gather additional forms and documents to support the application. These documents, ranging from financial statements to personal references, enhance the applicant's profile, providing a comprehensive view of their character, capabilities, and intentions. Here is a list of such documents often used alongside the Application to Date My Daughter form.

  1. Complete Financial Statement: This document provides a detailed view of the applicant's financial health, including income, debts, and assets, ensuring they are in a stable financial position.
  2. Job History: A resume or curriculum vitae showing the applicant’s work experience, positions held, and skills acquired, to assess their responsibility and stability.
  3. Ancestral Lineage: A family tree or documented history that outlines the applicant's heritage and background, possibly required to understand family values and legacy.
  4. Current Medical Report: A recent health examination report from a certified doctor, confirming the applicant's physical well-being and any medical conditions.
  5. Copy of Driver’s License: A valid driver’s license serves as a proof of identity and indicates legal permission to drive, ensuring the applicant's compliance with laws.
  6. Academic Records: Transcripts and diplomas that provide evidence of educational achievements and intellectual capabilities.
  7. Character References: Letters from non-family members who can vouch for the applicant’s character, habits, and integrity.
  8. Criminal Background Check: A report detailing any criminal history to ensure the safety and well-being of all parties involved.
  9. Drug Test Results: A recent clean drug test report to confirm the applicant does not use illegal substances.
  10. Social Media Profiles: Access to or prints of social media accounts for a casual insight into the applicant’s lifestyle, interests, and social conduct.

Accumulating and presenting these documents alongside the Application to Date My Daughter form not only adds a layer of formality and seriousness to the process but also ensures a thorough evaluation. By methodically addressing each area through relevant documents, applicants can better prepare themselves for scrutiny under the humorous pretense of the form, demonstrating sincerity and readiness to engage with the process meaningfully.

Similar forms

  • Employment Application: Like the Application for Permission to Date My Daughter, employment applications often require detailed personal information, job history, and references. Both aim to evaluate the applicant's suitability for a specific role or relationship, albeit in very different contexts.

  • College Application: This form shares similarities with college applications in that it asks for educational background, inclusive of GPA and school attended, aiming to assess the applicant’s academic credentials, similar to evaluating a suitor's qualifications and readiness.

  • Tenant Application Form: Much like the humorous daughter dating application, tenant applications require detailed personal information, including employment history and financial information, to judge the applicant's reliability and capability to fulfill commitments.

  • Loan Application: The requirement for a complete financial statement on the dating application mimics that of a loan application, where an individual’s financial stability and history are scrutinized to determine their capacity to repay the loan.

  • Passport Application: Both applications demand personal identification details, such as name, date of birth, and social security number, to verify the applicant's identity and maintain records.

  • Medical History Form: The request for a current medical report in the dating application parallels medical history forms that gather health information to assess an individual’s medical condition and history for treatment or preventative care.

  • Volunteer Application: Similar to the dating application, volunteer applications often require references and detailed personal information to evaluate the character and suitability of the volunteer for roles that require trustworthiness and integrity.

  • Adoption Application: This form shares the thorough scrutiny found in the dating application, extensively investigating the applicant's background, home environment, and financial stability to ensure a safe and supportive space for the adoptee.

  • Credit Card Application: Both applications involve an evaluation of financial responsibility, through a financial statement for the dating application and credit history checks for credit card applications, to determine the applicant's capability to manage financial obligations.

Dos and Don'ts

Filling out forms can often feel like navigating a maze. While the "Application for Permission to Date My Daughter" form might sound unusual, it's essential to tackle it—or any document—with a blend of seriousness and attention to detail. Here are several dos and don'ts to keep in mind that will help ensure your application is received in the spirit intended and avoids any unnecessary complications.

Dos:

  1. Read through the entire application first. Understanding every section will help you provide thoughtful and accurate responses.
  2. Gather all necessary documents beforehand. Having your financial statement, job history, ancestral lineage, and current medical report ready will make the process smoother.
  3. Answer honestly. Honesty is paramount, especially in sections about your background and intentions.
  4. Keep your answers clear and concise. Being succinct yet thorough shows respect for the reader's time.
  5. Check your spelling and grammar. While it may not be an English test, proper spelling and grammar reflect your attention to detail.
  6. Treat it with humor where appropriate. Recognizing the tongue-in-cheek nature of some questions can showcase your personality.
  7. Review your answers before submission. A final check can catch any mistakes or sections that may have been overlooked.

Don'ts:

  1. Don't take every question too seriously. Some parts are clearly designed to be humorous or exaggerated.
  2. Don't leave any sections blank. A complete application, as per the note at the beginning, is necessary for consideration.
  3. Don't ignore the document's unique requests. Complying with requests like not contacting by phone or writing signifies respect for the application's instructions.
  4. Don't underestimate the importance of permissions. Securing permission, even in a comedic form, underscores respect for personal boundaries.
  5. Don't forget to sign the application. An unsigned application, according to its terms, can be considered incomplete.
  6. Don't use inappropriate language or jokes. Keep your responses respectful and considerate.
  7. Don't expect an immediate response. Patience is a virtue, especially considering the form's humorous note on processing time.

Successfully navigating the application process, even for something as lighthearted as the "Application for Permission to Date My Daughter" form, requires a balanced approach. By focusing on clarity, honesty, and a healthy respect for the form's unique format, you'll ensure your application stands out—for all the right reasons.

Misconceptions

There are several misconceptions surrounding the "Application for Permission to Date My Daughter" form. It's important to clarify these misunderstandings to ensure everyone has a correct understanding of the document's intent and implications.

  • Misconception 1: The form is a legally binding document.
  • Many people mistakenly believe that the application form is legally binding, requiring compliance with its stipulations. In reality, this document is not recognized by any legal system. It’s intended as a humorous take on the protective nature some parents feel towards their children. Its legal enforceability is non-existent.

  • Misconception 2: Submission of personal information is mandatory.
  • The form appears to ask for sensitive personal information, including financial statements and medical reports. However, asking for such private details in reality would raise serious privacy concerns and likely violate personal data protection laws. The inclusion of these requests is intended for comedic effect rather than serious scrutiny.

  • Misconception 3: The form has been adopted by institutions.
  • Some believe this form is officially used by schools, churches, or law enforcement agencies. This is not the case. The document is purely a satirical creation by individuals aiming to entertain by overstating the lengths to which a parent might go to protect their daughter. It has no official or formal place in any institution's application procedures.

  • Misconception 4: Responses to the form have real consequences.
  • The form humorously threatens applicants with extreme consequences for incorrect answers, ranging from physical harm to long waiting periods for application approval. In reality, there are no consequences tied to how one fills out the form, as it is not taken seriously by any parent, individual, or organization. Its severe language and threats are part of its comedic exaggeration.

Understanding these misconceptions is crucial for recognizing the form’s humorous intentions without misinterpreting it as a serious or enforceable document. It's designed to poke fun at the overprotective nature some parents may exhibit, not to be taken as a literal or legally significant application.

Key takeaways

Completing the Application Date Daughter form requires attention to detail and a good understanding of its unique requirements. Here are seven key takeaways to help guide you through the process:

  • Ensure the application is fully completed, including all requested additional documents such as a financial statement, job history, ancestral lineage, and a current medical report from your doctor. Incomplete applications will be automatically rejected.
  • Be honest when providing personal information, including your name, date of birth, height, weight, IQ, and GPA, as these details could be verified at a later stage.
  • Understand that some questions, while seeming unconventional, such as your Boy Scout rank, the name of the police chief in your home town, and whether you own a van, truck with oversized tires, waterbed, or have any piercings, are part of the evaluation process and must be answered truthfully.
  • Political, societal, and personal beliefs will be assessed. Questions regarding the number of years your parents have been married, your stance on abstinence, and your interpretation of statements like "DON’T TOUCH MY DAUGHTER" are included to gauge your values and beliefs.
  • Your social and community involvement is under scrutiny as well. Information regarding your church attendance, pastor’s name, and how often you attend church services provides insight into your community engagement and moral foundation.
  • The application humorously warns applicants of the consequences of dishonesty or unsuitability through exaggerated penalties. Despite its tone, seriousness in filling out the form is expected.
  • Prepare for a lengthy processing time - applicants are humorously informed to allow 4 to 6 years for processing. While this is an exaggeration, it underscores the importance of patience and the extensive review process your application and suitability will undergo.

Remember, this form, while presented in a humorous and exaggerative manner, seeks honest and thoughtful responses. It serves as a creative way to vet potential interests, ensuring they respect the significance of dating someone's daughter.

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